1. |
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A lady said that she was a bear.
I said no ma’am you are not a bear.
She gave a roar and to my surprise -
She was a bear in a girl disguise.
Time stood still.
Now, follow me, me.
She took me back to her hideaway.
Behind her house she showed me the way.
There stood a 15-foot-tall giraffe.
It was a giraffe in a girl disguise.
My new mascot friends in a cave.
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2. |
Days of the Week
02:02
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Running so late on a Monday.
Running so late on a Tuesday.
Running so late on a Wednesday.
Running so late on a Thursday.
Running so late on a Friday.
Running late, running late, running late!
Gotta take a shower, gotta take a shower, gotta take a shower, gotta take a shower.
Running late, running late, running late!
Gotta take a shower, gotta take a shower, gotta take a shower, gotta take a shower.
Not running out of time anymore.
I have lots of time to find the door.
Not running out of time anymore.
My alarm went off just before four minutes of 10.
It’s Saturday!
It’s Sunday…
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3. |
Sheedy
02:36
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Here we go again in '83.
Seattle kids playing games in Sunnyvale.
Here we go again in '85.
I knew pixie sticks and combat boots were cool.
Ally, you made me wish I was David Lightman.
Ally, you made me wish I was a robot.
Which brings us to 1986.
11 million dollars on the loose.
But it stole your van and your heart.
"Who's Johnny?" she said as she smiled.
Here we go again in '83.
Seattle kids playing games with Joshua.
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4. |
Quit Waking Me Up
01:23
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Quit waking me up.
Quit waking me up.
Quit waking me up.
Quit waking me up.
Quit waking me up.
Quit waking me up.
Quit waking me up.
Quit waking me up.
Quit waking me up.
Quit waking me up.
Quit waking me up.
Quit waking me up.
Quit waking me up.
Quit waking me up.
Quit waking me up.
Quit waking me up.
Quit waking me up.
Quit waking me up.
Quit waking me up.
Quit waking me up.
Quit waking me up.
Quit waking me up.
Quit waking me up.
Quit waking me up.
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5. |
Microblog
00:57
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play this backwards.
hear the messages.
check my websites and you’ll see every microblog.
i’ll make a unique blog.
cater to communities.
technology is burning me.
thank god for backwards compatibility.
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6. |
Huffy Hog
01:57
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Please just take my dollar, bitch.
Won't you take my dollar, Bill?
We ain't got no money honey we've just got a huffy hog.
I have too much time to kill.
Internets will kill us all.
Help me to unplug machines. I just want a huffy hog.
Huffy hog. Huffy hog. Huffy hog.
Cat or dog?
Toad or frog?
Huffy hog.
Huffy missed the 90s.
Huffy missed the 80s.
Huffy likes what she sees.
Huffy got a bad 'tude.
Huffy hates when you're rude.
Huffy better than you.
Huffy first in her class.
Never finishes last.
Not ashamed of her past.
But she hopes that you will never find out.
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7. |
Yuki
01:38
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yuki is a ninja.
stealth-mode, creeper.
she'll steal your boyfriend.
and scratch her scratch post.
and leave without saying goodbye,
and stare, contemplating your slice.
and never, no she'll never think twice. go!
yeah, yuki.
everyday, nothing to say.
not much of a talker. adult stalker.
outside her window, she'll fuck your day up and won't apologize.
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8. |
Doug Rock
02:02
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once i arrived, by then everyone was drugged
and they took too long so i went back to the pub
where i worked upstairs solving problems for the man
but the man played the bass in a psychedelic band
and everybody said he wrote his songs in shapes.
i said you can't write a song in shapes.
they said he did.
i joined all of them and i took some of the drugs
but they took too long so i went over to doug's
and we spun a few discs just to try to get a feel
for the psychedelic band recorded live to reel to reel.
and everybody said they saw the song's colors.
i said colors do not a song make.
doug said they did.
and everybody said he wrote his songs in shapes.
i said you can't write a song in shapes.
i said colors do not a song make.
doug said they did.
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9. |
Minor Corrections
01:43
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(awesome music only)
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10. |
Video Armageddon
01:51
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california.
california.
fifty-thousand on double dragon.
california.
jenny lewis and kevin arnold.
power glove, it's so baaaaaad.
california.
california.
where'd you get that hat?
today you'll have to play a game that you've never played before.
super mario brothers THREE.
yeah bitches what do you think about THAT?
DAMN GURRRRL!
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11. |
Legend of the Red Dragon
01:43
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I like the fact that I played a game called Legend of the Red Dragon.
2400 bits per second off of a Hayes Smartmodem.
To be honest, I was a Death Knight, no skills in the Mystical.
Ten forest fights per day, and it’s best to connect at midnight.
Legend of the Red Dragon.
Legend of the Red Dragon.
I’d hit on Violet and get violent and befriend Seth Able.
And turn the tables on the Sysop so I could steal everyone’s passwords.
In this text-based space.
In this text-based space.
No 3D-rendered graphics.
Use your imagination.
Are you stupid or something?
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12. |
The Traveling Blinds
01:26
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They’re the travellin’ blinds.
No they can’t see.
They drive around in a big brown bus they’re the travellin’ blinds.
Three of a kind beats one pair.
Straight beats trips.
Flush beats a straight.
Full house starred Bob Saget and John Stamos.
They’re the travellin’ blinds.
No they can’t see.
They drive around in a big brown bus they’re the travellin’ blinds.
BIG BLIND SMALL BLIND CHIPS AHOY!
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13. |
Sixteen
01:13
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everyone will know my name when i turn 16.
they will buy my new cassette tape when i turn 16.
they might even utilize the new program that i wrote in VB (which i stole from bill gates) when i turn 16.
i forgot the name of my first prodigy account
and i can’t even imagine not having access to compuserve.
everyone will know my name when i turn 16.
i will get a nice plane and i’ll book a world tour when i turn 16.
i might even call home, say hi to my folks,
and i’ll make new friends, sleep with 10,000 girls when i turn 16.
when i turn 16 in 1996.
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14. |
Conspiracy
01:58
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everywhere that you go, everywhere that i go
weakest link in the chain, change your privacy goal
you authenticate me, algorithm is flawed
old security fail, new security fail
international net - work of competing thieves
never fully aware of what the system needs
timing takeover tests to coincide with this
manipulation works best when everyone’s afraid
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15. |
20,000 Leagues
01:45
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(just awesome music gah)
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16. |
Tutorial
01:29
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tutorial: first you gotta call your friends.
you have make them all mad at you
so that they'll tell everyone what you did
and you'll be closer to being alone.
you know this: next you gotta hurt your friends.
you need to stab 'em all in the back.
forget the trust that you have earned.
it's better spent on this ennui.
you gotta stay home and cut the lights.
you gotta cancel all your plans.
burn that bridge.
you can't be polite.
don't even try.
you need to form new partnerships
because the old ones have to end.
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hollygorock Atlanta, Georgia
I am hollygorock. Enjoy my short songs with references to retro things that I like.
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